Family Connect

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Spending Time with Our Kids Makes No Difference?

As American parents work to devise ways to spend more time with their children - and feel guilty about whether that time is enough,  a recent study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family suggests that the amount of time parents spend with their children has little influence on who the child becomes. 

Working mothers today spend equal amounts of time with their children as at-home moms did in the 1970s, but researchers found that mothers who spend time with their children when they are stressed affect their children negatively. 

Melissa Milkie, one of the study's authors and a sociologist at University of Toronto, says, "“I could literally show you 20 charts, and 19 of them would show no relationship between the amount of parents’ time and children’s outcomes." The study found positive associations for teens who spent an average of six hours a week engaged in family time with the parents. “So these are not huge amounts of time,” Milkie said.

Here's what Five Experts say on the topic:
1."That’s not to say that parent time isn’t important. Plenty of studies have shown links between quality parent time — such as reading to a child, sharing meals, talking with them or otherwise engaging with them one-on-one — and positive outcomes for kids. The same is true for parents’ warmth and sensitivity toward their children. It’s just that the quantity of time doesn’t appear to matter." Brigid Schulte (Washington Post family writer).2. "Research does show that in highly stressed urban environments, having involved parents and even strict parents is associated with less delinquent behavior," child and adolescent psychiatrist at Georgetown University Medical Center Matthew Biel said.
3. Amy Hsin, Queens College sociologist says that parents who spend the bulk of their time with children under 6 watching TV or doing nothing can actually have a “detrimental” effect on them. 
4. The American Academy of Pediatrics emphasizes that "children also need unstructured time to themselves without the engagement of parents for social and cognitive development."
5. Jennifer Senior (“All Joy and No Fun” author) attributed parent guilt to a nostalgia for the past and a continuing ambivalence about working mothers. “Perhaps if you were part of a culture that actually felt less ambivalent about mothers working, and had a system of child care in place where it was okay for mothers to work, I think you would automatically feel less guilt and pressure to spend more time with kids,” she said.

What do you think?